Comments on: Yes, Fight Back

By: puredoxyk

puredoxyk — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 15:22:18 +0000

BRILLIANT. You’re the next Gandhi in disguise. Let’s write the thinnest self-defense manual in history! ;)

By: puredoxyk

puredoxyk — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 15:21:34 +0000

Er…yes, actually, and I’m not trying to be contrarian (though I fully understand if that’s a suspicious claim coming from me). I grew up in the Midwest, and I’m used to communicating with people for whom grammar is barely a subject, and the only possible purpose for doing anything nonstandard is to annoy them. I am glad that the ‘Net is more forgiving and open-minded, and that within this format I’m free to even be *creative* about what I say and how I say it…but no, it’s definitely not a given for me that doing so won’t piss anybody off. ;)

On the flipside, you’re definitely right that one shouldn’t apologize, especially if you’re close enough to the line that what you’re doing can be excused as “creative”. In that case, one definitely ought to do away with the disclaimers and just go for it, and that’s something I rather suck at, so I appreciate the reminder/encouragement. Thanks!

By: elai

elai — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 04:15:14 +0000

Don’t apologize for the him/her/their thing & another ‘non-PC’ things! Has anyone, anyone in your life ever cared or said ANYTHING about it to you other than as a topic of converstation? Has anyone ever commented or emailed you about it? I’m guessing probably not.

By: Nick

Nick — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 11:11:35 +0000

I think learning to defuse situations, pre-empt them and having the ability to run 1/2 a mile very fast would be a VERY effective non-violent strategy.

All bar a couple of the fights I’ve had, I could have dealt with using the above.

By: puredoxyk

puredoxyk — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 22:59:30 +0000

My least favorite thing is martial arts that pretend to be about self-defense, but aren’t, and so end up failing both as self-defense mechanisms and for what they were originally designed for, which usually had a lot more to do with holistic mental/physical/spiritual development and awareness training — things that could be *useful* for self-defense, but not which existed for that purpose. I think people saw how incredibly good a kungfu or taiji master was at defending themselves, and concluded from there that that’s what martial arts was for. Like you say, there are things like Krav Maga — not what I’d call “martial arts” but rather just fighting systems — that will do a better job, by focusing on training you to fight, and ignoring the rest.

Personally, I have no desire to “learn to fight”. I don’t do it regularly and don’t plan to. And the things that can tip a dangerous situation in the favor of the would-be victim, like the ability to spot potentially-violent people, handle them psychologically, deliver a few nasty blows when needed, and keep your escape routes open, I already know how to do. I do think that everyone, especially every woman, should know those things, though; and most importantly should be encouraged to fight back rather than submit to violence. In spite of how obvious that part may seem to you and I, I think we have a long way to go as a culture before we get to where it’s a given.

Thanks for the comments!

By: Nick

Nick — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 14:57:24 +0000

Without a doubt, you should fight back. First, you may well prevent an attack and personal harm! Secondly, the attacker may lose his bottle- intimidation and control fuel many attacks, and without this, it might not seem such a good idea. Third, even if you cannot fend him off, at least you will know in your heart that you did everything and didn’t “let” it happen. We all know that the effects of any attack are still felt long after the physical wounds heal. In interviews of rape victims, the long term psychological effects were far less in those who were able to fight back.

It’s not the same (and I wouldn’t want to insult any rape victims by suggesting otherwise), but I was assaulted by a co-worker, who was black. I felt that if I had taken him out, that he would have made it a ‘race thing’- which means that the police would automatically side with him in their overzealous efforts to be ‘PC’. I ended up covering up and talking him down. I only had a bump on my lip and a sore neck, but I still feel gutted when I think about that fight. BTW, I have had dozens of fights and I don’t think about them much- even the ones where I lost.

If you want to learn to defend yourselves- no BS- then check out Krav Maga or Muay Thai. If you just want to pretend to defend yourself, then karate/ tai kwando or any 10 week self defence course will do. It will only give you false confidence.

Whatever method of self-protection you take, I hope you never need it. When you fight, you can’t win, even when you win.

By: personne

personne — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 13:33:30 +0000

It took me some time to realize what this “so they don’t get hurt” in the end means:
If you get injured, others will see it. And WE (not just you) have to deal with it.
If you don’t fight, you don’t get injured (physically) and nobody can SEE the crime. And if we can’t see a thing, everythings alright.

I am disguted. I don’t know what’s worse: That they don’t think* about what they are saying or that they actually believe it.

* Real thinking seems to be quiet seldom in most people.